December 24, 2009 6

How tiresome.

By in hmmmm

I get wrong numbers on my phone pretty regularly (like one a week or more) and today when my phone rang and it said ‘withheld’ I should have known better than to answer it. But, like a fool, I did (the woman we were subletting from-THANKS FOR CHARGING US AN EXTRA $150/MONTH!-blocks her calls too).

Me: Hello?

Him (stern voice): May I please speak to Cynthia Blahblah?

Me: Sorry, you have the wrong number.

Him: Really?

Me (super sarcastic voice): Nope! I was just kidding, this is Cynthia Blahblah!

Him: I’m an investigator from the Ontario Superior Courts and I need to…

Me: I was kidding I was kidding this isn’t Cynthia!

Then I hung up. Eek.  Then my phone rang again, it was withheld again, so I handed it off to Shannon:

This part is written by Shannon:

Him: Could I speak to Cynthia xxxxx please?

Me: Can I tell her who is calling?

Him: This is officer xxxx from the criminal courts division.

Me: What is this about?

Him: She has a court date coming up and I need to make sure that she’s going to be there. If she doesn’t show up, she’s going to jail.

Me, feeling like this is not the time to play games: Oh.. Well… This really is a wrong number. I’m honestly telling you the truth. You have a wrong number.

Him: Look, I just talked to her at that number and I know she’s there. She’s going to be in a lot of trouble.

Me: No, no, that wasn’t her, you have a wrong number.

Him: She told me it was her. I know she’s there.

Me: No, she was just joking with you… You have a wrong number.

Him: I have a lot of trouble believing that. Why would someone do that? This is a serious matter and I need to talk to her.

Me: Honestly, you have a wrong number! I’m not lying to you! She was just joking because she gets constant wrong numbers, and you didn’t believe her when she told you it was a wrong number.

Him: Look, I know she’s there and I know this is her number. I need to talk to her.

Me: I’m not lying to you! You really, really have a wrong number!

Him: Well, I’m going to have to open a criminal investigation into this phone number now.

[click]

Lord. What have I done?

6 Responses to “How tiresome.”

  1. nikk says:

    sounds almost like a prank call.

  2. Rach says:

    I feel like that last statement was probably an exaggeration. To what extent can there really be a “criminal investigation” into a phone number? It seems like all it would be–if anything–is typing your number into some computer and finding out it’s registered to you.

  3. Caitlin Jane says:

    I agree, Rach, I think the guy was just being a dick. Unless he meant that he will, indeed, look up my number, and then investigate ME to find out if I am friends with this Cynthia criminal.

    Honestly, after this, I am pretty sure he looked the number up, dialed it correctly (because the first time he misdialed and the second time he just redialed) and felt like a big man for threatening me.

  4. Elizabeth says:

    Eeeek, all the same.

  5. Twwly says:

    Y’all don’t need anymore hassles!

    (Next time tell them she’s dead! :P)

  6. Will says:

    That call sounds very fishy. Since when do government offices have “Number withheld” Id’s. It sounds more like a debt collector .

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